The Brave In Me

I need to break this,
I need to move beyond these fearful fits,
these carried away moments of desperate rage,
a clustered up weight of regretful days,
I sweat in cold air, burning inside to run far away,
I gotta find passion and kisses and burning sun rays!
So I stand at a bus stop staring at the sun,
screaming for a bus that never comes,
I dress myself for the day and curse the face I see,
I curse the creature hiding in me!
I need to finally break this,
I need to escape this monster’s mangled fists,
to heal its twisted thoughts and its fear to simply be,
I just need to somehow find the brave in me!

Rick Garrett © 2014

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Fly

Sometimes I feel like
at some point,
in some time,
I died.

And here I am,
spinning around,
chasing time,
flying by.

So I make this choice,
to wake back up,
to let it all go…
and fly.

Rick Garrett © 2013

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Colors

The sun said goodbye and darkness descended like fog, millions of arms reaching and expanding, veiling the vast and enslaved worlds within my numbed flesh;

Paved grooves of tortured thought, gnarled and mired superhighways winding and winding toward my pounding head – upon them fear bound caravans blindly rushed.

This body ached with every uncertain step, this life yearned to fly to better choices, to a braver host; I choked from the hold of so many polluted and tangled ethers.

Did I once have wings – I stomped the ground, I screamed to the half moon that shivered in the dark sky…did the sun ever shine, did it spray glorious colors across my mortal feathers?

Then a moment fell upon me, a moment full of striking clarity, and I could hear a faint tapping at my mind – a choice I’d always had; if only for a little while, I could decide to just shut up, to let my desperate thoughts go and let light in.

And I did! I saw many forms of brilliantly dancing light – I saw purple and blue, pink and green; even orange, purple, and yellow…dancing, spinning…up, around – sensuously flying in the wind!

I was and still am this largely imperfect and well-intentioned man, overwhelmingly conflicted and easily confounded – innocent and wise – brave and cowardly – sinful and angelic –

But in spite of this swirling mass of imperfection, I allowed silent grace inside; new life sprung upon the vast worlds within – dawn broke through and colors were set free to love and play like a healing tonic…an uncontrolled yet seemingly orchestrated frolic.

Rick Garrett © 2013

Dismantled

I was there, lying dreamingly on that sandy beach…
when Love appeared, when it snuck up and washed over me.

I was ripe, my heart was open wide, a fertile seed,
Love had no trouble pushing its tide to reach all around and over me.

I thought it was fresh, thought it was salvation, a welcome sensation;
it cooled the sun’s hot breath – an immaculate domination.

And I smiled and sighed, I fell into ecstatic bliss;
Love just poured and caressed and pleased my soul, but then it began to pound its salty fists;

It swirled and swooshed and quickly crossed an awful line;
it rushed and burned through my gasping lungs and viciously numbed my fearful mind.

A seductive killer had come to call from the depths of the infinite sea –
that sly and fickle Love dismantled the door to my simple heart, it disfigured all the good and recognizable in me.

Rick Garrett © 2013

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123RF Photo

Pieces

From my dark room, I looked out my window in to a crisp winter night –
like dust from a shattered moon, a million pieces of something blanketed the grass and trees;
they looked like stars that had lost their way and fallen from a lonely sky.
So bundled up, I stepped outside and stood among the scattered debris;
one by one, hour after hour, I placed them all back in the sky’s bosom
where they sparkled above a heart that too had lost its way,
shedding the light of a new day.

Rick Garrett © 2012

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Swimming 2.0

Sometimes I feel it so profoundly –
the world, full of maddening voices screaming in my ears,
so damn loud, so everywhere,
empty words, misguided folk busy fermenting fear.

So underwater I go, naked and free,
swimming beneath a million stars at play;
the water’s silence, it hides me
while the moon sheds the glow of the coming day.

And as i lay within the water’s quiet belly,
those voices wrestle wildly in the cool wind above,
careless words that threaten to dim the stars,
swinging the world in and out of love.

But in that perfect moment, I find peace,
weightless in that silent symphony;
the world above, it’s lulled to sleep by the soft arm of a moonbeam,
it’s loud voices hushed in the amber of falling leaves.

Rick Garrett © 2012

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Hope and Imperfection

This one tired wing,
its feathers gently sway,
rhythmic waves in burning wind.

It’s my only strength,
my faithful friend, a measure of faith –
balancing me as the other mends.

Torn between hope and imperfection,
I surrender my fear, I lean on my ruffled wing –
and it flies, heroically carries me through devastation.

Rick Garrett © 2012

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